32 Moments of Silence

This is just too horrible. Please pray for their families.

I worried about my safety while I was a college student, but I never, ever even thought about anything this horrible happening on my campus. It's just too shocking. The blog will be silent for the rest of the day.

Advice from a heartless bitch

Buried at PhotoCasket.com
Some Friday fun: a fantastic rant from one of my favorite websites, Heartless Bitches International. This excerpt is pretty acidic, but the post itself isn't the anti-man rant that it appears to be at first. Check it:

Too many men derive their sense of superiority from the fact that that they think they must be needed by women. The primordial fear instilled by strong women into the unevolved mind is one that says "If a women don’t need me, then what good am I? What do I have to offer? How can I control her and the relationship if she doesn't need me?" In the same way that women need to re-think their roles in society, so too do men. They need to realize that they have to offer much more to a relationship than a paycheck and jar opener service. They need to stop treating their romantic relationships as competitions. Many of them need to grow up and realize that they can’t continue to be children in adult bodies and get away with acting like imbeciles just because they "bring home the bacon". When a man is no longer "needed" for financial or other support, he has to really grow up and be an adult. He has to be someone women can love and respect - someone a woman wants to be with, rather than someone a woman needs. It seems that many men are terrified of this prospect.

Readers, it bugs the living shit out of Yours Truly when I see a guy's friends try to take him down because they're jealous of or threatened by the no-nonsense chick he's dating. My bepenised readers, I implore you, don't put up with that kind of nonsense from your homies! Refer said homies to my man Yoda.

Read the entire post here.

SCTV Moment of Zen

I've had a busy week; I'll have time to put up a new post this weekend. In the meantime, here are Andrea Martin, John Candy, Eugene Levy, Joe Flaherty and an almost unrecognizable Martin Short as The Queen Haters!

Lazy blogging

I have a bunch of maid of honor duties to deal with today, not to mention work, so here's a little quiz in the meantime.

Your Love Number is 5

You're very open minded, and you could see yourself in any number of interesting relationships. And being extremely independent, anyone you're with has to give you space. You approach new lovers like they are a subject, learning everything about them. But once you've "mastered" a new person, you often feel like exploring some one else!

What Is Your Love Number?

New Interview

*E at A Blog Without A Bicycle asked me to be a part of her very cool feminist blogger interview project. The interview is posted here. Some other great bloggers are featured too; check out those interviews if you get a chance.

SCTV Moment of Zen - mini tribute

I miss Rick Moranis.

You couldn't watch a comedy in the 80s or early 90s without seeing him, and he was always funny, even when playing the straight guy. He's one of the most brilliant SCTV cast members ever (and that's saying a lot). After his wife passed in '91, he only made a few more movies before going into semi-retirement to raise his two young children. That makes me admire the guy, but it was a loss for his fans.

In recent years, he's written a few hilarious op-ed pieces for the New York times, and re-partnered with Dave Thomas to resurrect the Mackenzie Brothers for the Brother Bear movies. In 2005, he released a comedy country album called The Agoraphobic Cowboy (I hate country music, but I have this album and I love it), and got a well-deserved Grammy nomination for Best Comedy Album. The dude is seriously talented, and Yours Truly has always thought him adorable, since I'm a "funny is sexy" kinda woman. Now that his kids are grown, I'm hoping he'll wade back into movies and television (just a little bit! Please, Rick!).

While I'm waiting, I'll provide a double dose of Zen for your Friday - Rick Moranis's scarily perfect impersonations of Dick Cavett and Woody Allen.

Hail...myself?!

I wanted to get some exercise last Saturday afternoon, so I put on my sweats, grabbed my portable CD player and headed out for a walk. It was a mild, sunny afternoon, and a lot of people were outside enjoying the weather.

I was making my way down a busy street when I noticed a man walking towards me. He was in his late 60s, Middle Eastern, about 5'6". He wore a white shirt, jeans, loafers, sport coat, baseball cap and sunglasses. He had his hands clasped behind his back and was walking casually, the way a sightseer would. He didn't seem to be looking at anything in particular, much less at me.

When he was about five feet in front of me, he stopped in his tracks, clicked his heels together...and saluted.

I've had some random encounters, but that was a new one.

I briefly considered saluting back, but I wasn't sure what he'd do next. Keep it simple, right? I just smiled, nodded, and went on my way.

Rent boy redux

Buried at PhotoCasket.com

Readers, I'm sure you all remember this post, in which I related my difficulty in finding a new roommate. Although my online ad specifically says that I'm looking for another single woman to share my apartment with, I've been getting lots of emails from guys. Most of them are gay, with the occasional American Gigolo wannabe thrown in.

I got an email yesterday from a young man called Brent, a 25-year-old self-proclaimed "submissive" who wants to crash at my pad in exchange for being "a cook, maid, errand boy and slave."

Yes, he said slave.

"Would you have any interest in a roommate who'll cook, clean and do literally anything you say?" asks Brent. "I hope so."

I don't mean to sound ungrateful, but no, Brent. No interest. In fact, the very word "submissive" turns me off. Call me closed-minded, but leashes are for dogs, not people.

Sigh.

What is it about my ad that screams "S+M"? Apparently "Professional female, 30s, laid-back, clean, looking for same to share 2bed. No drugs, no drama" translates into "GET THAT SKINNY ASS IN THE AIR SO I CAN WHACK IT 'TILL IT'S RAW WHILE YOU SCRUB MY KITCHEN FLOOR! NOW SAY 'THANK YOU, MISTRESS'!!" SMACK!!!

I've only been in LA for 3 1/2 years, so I still don't get some of the lingo. My bad.

Is this happening because I'm on Craigslist? I'm not having this kind of trouble on Roommates.com. I shudder to think about the kinds of responses I'd get if I put up a personal ad.

Unfair

Please indulge me while I take a moment to be political, dear readers. My cousin P is a Marine. He has done two tours in Iraq. He's had a few close calls over there, and he doesn't agree with the war, or how it's being (mis)handled. Each time he made it back to the States in one piece, we all breathed a sigh of relief. So, the family just found out that he may be called back for a third tour. Apparently the Marines aren't making their new recruit quota (shocker!), so they're calling the inactive marines back.

I am furious for so many reasons, but I don't want this post to be about me. I want it to be about our soldiers, who deserve better than they're getting; I want it to be about the parents of those soldiers, who have to cross their fingers that their children will come home safe.

Instead of talking about my own feelings, I'd like to share the thoughts of P's mother M, who is also my godmother. She wrote a long and emotional email to friends and family after finding out that P may be called to duty any day now. In the early morning hours, unable to sleep, she wrote:

It's without a doubt a moral crisis and our kids going to suffer for what? I think everyone should talk amongst their families and send an email to their respective congressman or woman and senator and state your case for these kids, all our kids.

It's enough. We need to leave and we need to turn our attention to the ones that did survive and need our care and support for their lives. And by the way, they should get the same damn benefits the congress and senate receive. They serve the American people, and our soldiers, Marines, Army, Navy - all our military should get the same top notch medical to take care of them. They are our heroes, they went in good faith and only to find out they have to wait and struggle to wait for medical care? It's disgraceful. So many now have mental and psychiatric issues that cannot be ignored. I have to ask the President, how is this being patriotic?

This whole mess from the beginning did not have a concise plan. I don't want to let my son go. It's wrong, it's immoral, these kids deserve better, they deserve a better president, in fact, they deserve a better "commander in chief" and they still don't have one.

I have promised myself that if my son goes over again I will write to President Bush again, as I have done before, and tell him my thoughts for the day as a mother concered for her son for the 3rd time over in Iraq. Maybe he can send some free food once in awhile, since they are charged for their food whether they eat it or not, and maybe I can remind him the his lovely daughters would be more than welcome serving their country. What citizens could be more proud than their own parents President and Mrs. Barbara Bush? Oh, and before I forget, P's parents will lovingly send him off with all the equipment he needs whatever it costs after the government issue is given out and the rest of the stuff that they REALLY need they won't receive. This has happened two times, and what do you say to a marine heading off to Iraq? 'NO?'...you say, 'whatever you need, you'll have it...'

Funny, we heard the president and Rumsfeld say the same thing 4 years ago and then again a year later and we still had to send $$$ for equipment and supplies that would be more safe than what was government standard issue...but I keep forgetting...the president said we are winning?

CAN SOMEONE DEFINE WHAT WINNING MEANS?

I am so very sad. My heart is heavy...just waiting, waiting, waiting....please write to someone and ask them to stop this and stop it now..

and pray for P and all his Marine brothers. – M

I can't add anything to that. We don't often get to hear from the mothers and fathers who wait and worry. My family is just one more family that's being put in the awful position of keeping our fingers crossed yet again. The parents of our soldiers aren't getting any answers, the American people have been lied to for years, and this war of greed is ruining the lives of Americans and Iraqis who did not seek it.